Tuesday, April 11, 2006

the simple things in life

Dying by accident is tragic, but can be doubly so if one dies in a compromising position on a vibrating bed in Bangkok while lying on an inflatable doll. Death is inevitable but, despite the aluminum smelter means death, it is not inevitable. Many years ago, Albert Einstein was asked if the Universe was infinite, to which he replied that he is not sure, but he is sure human stupidity is. There is now sufficient proof that this is still so as politicians continue to roam the planet, destroying everything in their path.

To make life simple, the members from the four top professions in the world (engineers, lawyers, doctors and blogers), decided there would only be two causes of death, natural and unnatural (yes, it normally takes four professions to decide two things). What goes where continues to be vague, but so far the Cause of Death Organization (CODO) has made some strong recommendations. Under natural causes there is disease, old age, stray bullets from gang-related-shoot-outs, uninstalling spyware, and checking the price of steel. Under unnatural causes there is homicide, suicide, angry spouse and/or girlfriend, runaway bus, flying stones from weed-whackers, smelter fumes - aka: political effluent, and inflatable dolls. Regardless of your conviction, or lack of it, you will die from a cause, but not necessarily while lying in Bangkok.

Like most people of this planet I don't want to die too soon so, out of fear, I don't waste time thinking about it. I also don't willfully increase the odds of death happening sooner than necessary. I drive slow, eat healthy, avoid listening to political speeches, read The Hitchhikers Guide Four-Part Trilogy while climbing small hills, blog at least once a week, enjoy weekends, hate Mondays, download empeethrees, burn CDs, photograph everything, smile insanely, read blogs, refuse to grow up, keep an eye out for cell phone specials, collect pictures of Paris Hilton, and laugh while I write.

For me, life is simple and if I can get a Motorola C115 cell-phone for $49 I am happy. If I can top up at 10,000 locations across the country, I am ecstatic. Now, if only I can overcome my fear of cell phones life would be grand. Life is too short to waste on wanting, and the simple things in life are cheap, for everything else there is a layaway plan.